As stated before I thought once rehab was complete the "hardest" part would be over because the brain would be retrained and there would be no drugs in the system.
In the addiction portion we learned that it takes up to two years for the brain to be reprogrammed. In 4-6 weeks the addict can be stabilized but during this "2" yr re-programming there are numerous post acute withdraw symptoms that can occur. They generally peak during first 3-6 months. These include: inability to think clearly, memory problems, emotional over-reaction or numbness, sleep issues, coordination struggled, inability to handle stress.
The addict can and will learn coping skills for how to deal with these symptoms. The loved one should also establish coping skills.
Alanon or Narcanon are highly recommended because you will find people going through identical or similar situations.
My favorite Alanon phrase is the three C's:
I didn't cause this
I can't control it
I can't cure it
I have to realize that it IS a disease and I can only control what I am able to. WHAT can I control?
I am only able to control my self.
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
Addiction- progressive,chronic, morbid disease
This is how addiction was described in the class. It is a a primary disease meaning it isn't a symptom of any other condition. It is chronic because there is no cure and requires abstinence to stop. It's progressive because symptoms and results will continually get worse over time. It is potentially fatal in that it can kill directly or indirectly.
(All of these statements can be filled in with drugs or alcohol. If I only use one it's out of habit.)
Initially the drug is fun and makes the user happy. Difference between an addict and average person......
Average person has one-two drinks or "hits" of a drug and stops. They don't want to loose control. Because of this body reaction they know their limits, set them, and make a decision to stop.
Addict doesn't feel a loss of control. They feel exhilarated, uplifted, and even if there is a miserable hang over their mindset focuses on the lift portion.
The addicts brain is basically having an allergic reaction to the drug in that it manifests in a craving. The brain makes a connection that each time it gets the drug/alcohol it is happy! The addict feels no anxiety. When consequences happen their mind makes excuses. As the addiction takes control they find they can't function on routine tasks without it. They are only tired, bored, can't focus, cough, feel anxious without it and that's no fun!
They begin to see TONS of reasons to stop (family,work,school, faith) but the powerful connection is stronger and they are too trapped in it to quit.
Suddenly the fun is gone- they are humiliated-
Drug is their #1 priority.
There are two portions of the brain: the conscious (aware) and primitive mind. The primitive mind is where thirst comes from, the ability to walk without thinking, the body telling the lungs to breathe..... This is also where addiction lies. The drug/alcohol changes the brain and beings demanding the need just like the body needs food. The chemicals from the drugs block space so that healthy cells can't get in anymore.
Good news: the brain can be retrained!!! But it can take 6mos to 2 years for brain to heal!
Tips: (for success and to excel process)
Stop using
Give it time
Get in a treatment program
Healthy eating
Sleep on a consistent schedule
Exercise
Study, read, memorize, sudoku, crosswords
Religion/quiet time
(All of these statements can be filled in with drugs or alcohol. If I only use one it's out of habit.)
Initially the drug is fun and makes the user happy. Difference between an addict and average person......
Average person has one-two drinks or "hits" of a drug and stops. They don't want to loose control. Because of this body reaction they know their limits, set them, and make a decision to stop.
Addict doesn't feel a loss of control. They feel exhilarated, uplifted, and even if there is a miserable hang over their mindset focuses on the lift portion.
The addicts brain is basically having an allergic reaction to the drug in that it manifests in a craving. The brain makes a connection that each time it gets the drug/alcohol it is happy! The addict feels no anxiety. When consequences happen their mind makes excuses. As the addiction takes control they find they can't function on routine tasks without it. They are only tired, bored, can't focus, cough, feel anxious without it and that's no fun!
They begin to see TONS of reasons to stop (family,work,school, faith) but the powerful connection is stronger and they are too trapped in it to quit.
Suddenly the fun is gone- they are humiliated-
Drug is their #1 priority.
There are two portions of the brain: the conscious (aware) and primitive mind. The primitive mind is where thirst comes from, the ability to walk without thinking, the body telling the lungs to breathe..... This is also where addiction lies. The drug/alcohol changes the brain and beings demanding the need just like the body needs food. The chemicals from the drugs block space so that healthy cells can't get in anymore.
Good news: the brain can be retrained!!! But it can take 6mos to 2 years for brain to heal!
Tips: (for success and to excel process)
Stop using
Give it time
Get in a treatment program
Healthy eating
Sleep on a consistent schedule
Exercise
Study, read, memorize, sudoku, crosswords
Religion/quiet time
My faulty fixed belief about addiction
I want to post a series of blogs about the information I gained in my education classes at Caron. Primarily because I have friends who are hurting just like I am and I hope this can help them like it has me. Additionally, I thought it might help to be available to my friends and family who may know someone they want to share it with.
So, I want to be honest. Going into this I believed many things:
I believed that each time Vince chose to get high he was making a conscious choice of his drugs over me/us/our family.
I believed that if he really wanted to stop he could decide to do so and it would be over.
I believed that after a 31 day inpatient program he would come home his old self, ready to be responsible, and 'cured' of his addiction.
What I learned will spread out over a series of posts.
Feelings I had through the course of this and sometimes still today:
Anger. How do you love someone and hate them at the same time? ( it's not as hard as you think)
Fear. Who is he gonna hurt? Where's he gonna go? When's he gonna come home?
Sadness. Why am I not enough? Why won't he choose us? Why do I have to go through this?
Frustration. I didn't choose this, I'm not accepting of this, do I have to live with this? Why?
Evil. Maybe if this kills him I won't have to deal with this anymore! (this is followed by guilt, remorse, and sadness)
Stay tuned.....
So, I want to be honest. Going into this I believed many things:
I believed that each time Vince chose to get high he was making a conscious choice of his drugs over me/us/our family.
I believed that if he really wanted to stop he could decide to do so and it would be over.
I believed that after a 31 day inpatient program he would come home his old self, ready to be responsible, and 'cured' of his addiction.
What I learned will spread out over a series of posts.
Feelings I had through the course of this and sometimes still today:
Anger. How do you love someone and hate them at the same time? ( it's not as hard as you think)
Fear. Who is he gonna hurt? Where's he gonna go? When's he gonna come home?
Sadness. Why am I not enough? Why won't he choose us? Why do I have to go through this?
Frustration. I didn't choose this, I'm not accepting of this, do I have to live with this? Why?
Evil. Maybe if this kills him I won't have to deal with this anymore! (this is followed by guilt, remorse, and sadness)
Stay tuned.....
Saturday, March 2, 2013
Training for Change
Last Saturday at this time I was sitting in a training facility at Caron. My nerves were like live wires dispite the many oils I was applying and a headache was brewing. Today, just one week later, I am looking over the notes I wrote during the 5 days of class and it is absolutely overwhelming.
We started with a group of 11. There was a mixture of wives, husbands, sisters, brothers, and parents of patients in attendance. Our small group would quickly bond in the realization that our loved ones had been taken over by a vicious disease called addiction. The deafening announcement that their brains could take up to twelve years to return to their normal functionality was astounding. I didn't realize until that moment just how much of an impact this had on Vince and how long his road to recovery would be. I sincerely thought if he spent detox in rehab and got the drugs out of his system, he would be himself again and we would have a new life in 31 days.
Soooooooo wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!
In the end many of the techniques, coping skills, communication skills and lessons were very similar to a Focus class I had taken with Vince almost 18 years ago. The refresher was phenomenal and with a "little" maturity on board now I am ready to make changes.
Vince will be focusing on changes for himself and I will be working on changes for me. I have a lot I need to work on, sorry if that is shocking ;)
Together we can work on meaningful changes for our family.
I'm getting nervous about him coming home soon. Just 12 more days!
We started with a group of 11. There was a mixture of wives, husbands, sisters, brothers, and parents of patients in attendance. Our small group would quickly bond in the realization that our loved ones had been taken over by a vicious disease called addiction. The deafening announcement that their brains could take up to twelve years to return to their normal functionality was astounding. I didn't realize until that moment just how much of an impact this had on Vince and how long his road to recovery would be. I sincerely thought if he spent detox in rehab and got the drugs out of his system, he would be himself again and we would have a new life in 31 days.
Soooooooo wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!
In the end many of the techniques, coping skills, communication skills and lessons were very similar to a Focus class I had taken with Vince almost 18 years ago. The refresher was phenomenal and with a "little" maturity on board now I am ready to make changes.
Vince will be focusing on changes for himself and I will be working on changes for me. I have a lot I need to work on, sorry if that is shocking ;)
Together we can work on meaningful changes for our family.
I'm getting nervous about him coming home soon. Just 12 more days!
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